The Man and His Wife (Part 1)
The Man and His Wife (Part 1)
- “Do women deserve unconditional love, especially when they behave naughty, are unsubmissive and are unwelcoming?”
- “Is it practicable to love the 21st century woman, and ones wife in particular, unconditionally?”
- “How does the way we treat our wives affect our children’s emotional and mental security, and their destinies by extension?”
“As long as a man is committed to loving his wife, he’s committed to his marriage; and when a marriage works, children are more likely to turn out wonderful and fulfilling. When a marriage fails, the man and wife are not the primary losers – the children are. A child from a broken home has a 50% chance of going down the same route and the cycle keeps repeating. A good man will be careful not to do things that will create negative family patterns for his children.”
At some point in my marriage, I almost lost it because my wife can argue about anything and would hardly ever concede a point. I felt she was neither submissive not as respectful of my views as I wanted her to be. Whenever I said something, I would want her to accept it; especially when I was certain that I was right, but that was almost never the case. I got angry almost daily and could go on for days with cold treatment. That continued for years and at some point, I was barely getting along with her.
One day, during a routine discussion with an older friend on unrelated issues; he made a casual statement about his resolve never to argue or get angry with his wife, no matter what happened, and went on to state that things subsequently improved between them and became much better than they had been for most part of their marriage. They have children in their late teens.
Without telling him anything, I resolved to do the same. Once my wife began seeing things differently while we were discussing an issue, I would simply allow her to do the talking. That way I got less and less angry and found more and more reasons to love her.
Over time, she came to realise what I was doing and gradually began respecting my views more. Its been a few months now, and weve had no arguments or bottled emotions. We’ve been doing very well and loving unconditionally has been a lot easier for me.
Loving a woman unconditionally has never been and will never be easy. It takes determination to keep your home as a man, and takes a lot of compromise but is very rewarding.
Your children will be raised in an atmosphere of peace, where parents are happy together and the man is less prone to stress-related diseases that come with unsettled marriages.
Olumofin, Kehinde Benjamin writes for Praying Parents Prayer Group Christian Ministry (3pG)