STEPS TOWARD A BEAUTIFUL MARRIAGE (Part 2)

WHO I DON’T WANT TO BE

In order to facilitate your understanding of who or what you will like to be as a wife or as a husband, let start with what obviously you won’t like to be once married. I hope my assumption will be right.

1. You don’t want to be a wife beater or abuser of husband.

2. You don’t want to be a disturbed person (irrational and unpredictable, fearsome and unapproachable).

3. You don’t want to be a haters of God. Someone with a dark heart who has no interest in spiritual and godly things.

4. You don’t want to be an irresponsible parent, who have no time for his/her children.

5. You wouldn’t love to be a prayerless and powerless Christian man or woman who can’t protect his/her family in prayers.

6. You don’t want to be an unwise married partner who can’t contribute meaningfully on any discussion. What in English is called Bimbos (Handsome or beautiful but unintelligent), that should not be you.

7. You don’t want to be a poor manager of resources (money, spouse, children, etc.).

8. You don’t want to be a burden for your spouse in any way.

9. You don’t want to have a life threatening health challenge once married.

10. You don’t want to be the difficult, incompatible bad choice for your partner.

11. etc.

Discourse Question 1:

Why do you think any of the person described above will most likely have a failed marriage if he/she is ever married?

The marriage will likely fail because it was never planned for. None of the items mentioned that you don’t want to be was planned for. Nobody plan to be any of those. And when one don’t plan to succeed, one will simply plan to fail.

You can’t just wake up one morning and find yourself in Lagos or Abuja if that’s not where you slept the night before. If you must wake up and find yourself in a city or town, you must make plan, travel and go there. Marriage is like that, Christian marriage in particular, you don’t just expect yourself to wake up one morning and find yourself in a blissful marriage unplanned.

Many young people never see the need to pray for their future spouses, future homes, future marriages or future children until they find themselves in the middle of those things. You must have had an idea of how many children you want to have, the names you will call them, your desired family set up etc., far before you enter the marriage.

 Nothing good come unplanned, not even Christian parenting and Christian family.

Have you noticed there are husbands and wives who had new babies and for the next 8 days they get confused looking for and scampering for names for their new arrivals? Then you begin to wonder where they were for the 9 months the women were pregnant. Have you seen such as well? It shows how much people leave things for chance, and they never plan.

Don’t let your life be like that, don’t let your marriage be like that, if you must have good and godly home, start to plan for what you will love to be as married man or woman. It won’t happen if you don’t plan, pray and work for it. And if you must pray, start praying now for your home, marriage and children. If you wait till you have fixed your wedding date before praying and plan for Christian home, you must have waited too late.

If you don’t regularly pray, fast, and plan for what you will like to be as married Christian adults, even now that you are probably not ready for marriage then you may be surprise when you notice yourself manifesting those other things you really don’t want to be. You can start planning today.

If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them (John 13:17.

Olumofin Kehinde Benjamin writes for Praying Parents Prayer Group Christian Ministry (3pG)