By Seyi Pedro-Adetola

Father we thank You once again for tonight. Thank You for bringing us together and what You have in store for us. Holy Spirit over to you. Breathe on Your word and make it fruitful in our lives in Jesus’ name. Amen. Tonight by the grace of God, we shall be looking at; HOW TO HANDLE REJECTION OR BROKEN RELATIONSHIP.

From the topic, the first thing the Holy Spirit called my attention to is that word, ‘HANDLE’. Literally, before you can handle something, you must know about it. You can’t handle what you don’t know because you will mishandle it. To handle a book, an item, health…even human being, you must know that thing very well. You must have a deep knowledge about it…you know the value, worth, strength, weakness, do and don’t. You must know WHAT it is. If you don’t know WHAT rejection is, you can’t handle it. Knowing WHAT it is, is a function of HOW you see it. How you see it controls the way you react to it. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.

In English, REJECTION means Non-acceptance but I will say REJECTION is REDIRECTION. Now, let’s talk from the literally meaning.. Non-acceptance…Of course rejection leads to broken relationship. So permit me if I get carried away using the term ‘Rejection’ alone. Once you can handle rejection, you will handle broken relationship well. So, who is rejecting you? Or who is not accepting you? Although, this meeting is supposed to be on marital issue but I tell you it cuts across every facets of life. Even at your place of work, you can experience rejection, even in marriage, business etc. The Lord is helping us. Back to the question, who is not accepting you? That is, you are being rejected by who? MAN? (NOTE: When I use man, I don’t mean male gender alone, I mean human being as applicable to you.The truth is, if you live for people’s acceptance, you will die from their rejection. So, whose acceptance are you waiting for?

Just 2 PERSONALITIES are important when it comes to ACCEPTANCE. If those two do not reject you, it will be hard for you to experience rejection anywhere and peradventure it happens, it is not rejection. It is REDIRECTION

The two personalities:

1. GOD

If God accepts you, it will be difficult for men to reject you. If they do, it is on their own risk. Instead of living your life to please men just to get acceptance from them, why can’t you focus the attention, love and service on God. Many people are experiencing rejection and of course broken relationshipssss because God is not accepting them. We are going somewhere. 1 Samuel 15:23B “Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, He also has rejected you from being king.” You reject God when you reject His words.

Sin makes men reject the word of God and makes God reject man if he refuses to trace his steps back to God. This is the story of King Saul, do we remember the story? Do not commit fornication…Bed undefiled but you went ahead to sleep with that man, just to make him accept you…the relationship is broken already even before you started it. Sin brings rejection. Don’t toil with it. If God accepts you, anyone that rejects you reject God. Who does that? You reject God you reject LIFE. He is life, in Him is life, …it means you carry life, only the ‘dead’ (in the spirit) can reject you. So, if you live all your life to please God and someone breaks up with you on that note; then such person is dead while living. So, why should you feel bad that deadness leaves your life? It should be a thing of joy and celebration.

How much of God’s word have you compromised because you want men’s attention? That is the Genesis of broken relationship. Because if you have their acceptance today, based on that, then tomorrow you will loose it. That is the principle and that is what broken relationship is all about. Concentrate on pleasing God. 1 Samuel 8:7 “And the Lord said to Samuel, “Heed the voice of the people in all that they say to you; for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me, that I should not reign over them.” That is the verdict when you are on the Lord’s side

2. ACCEPT YOURSELF

Don’t reject yourself.

The question is WHO ARE YOU? Have you discovered yourself? If you haven’t, that is the number 1 thing you need to know. What do you know about yourself? Who are you? If you can’t define yourself, people will define you based on their own limitation. If you don’t know yourself, how do you expect people to know you. You don’t accept what you don’t know. Stop being a stranger to yourself. Knowing yourself means discovering purpose. What is/are the reasons for your existence? If you don’t know this, you don’t need any relationship I beg… because your real self unfolds, that relationship may scatter. It may not really be a negative discovery. Not all the goods are good for you. In Genesis 3, Adam had found purpose before God brought Eve to him. Time will not permit us to express this fully.

When God accepts you and you also accept yourself i.e you are proud of who you are IN CHRIST JESUS, then that rejection and broken relationship are divine blessings. You don’t feel less of yourself. Don’t be at anyone’s mercy. Do not allow man defines you. You are tall, celebrate it. You are short, fat, slim…accept yourself the way you are, if not nobody will accept you. Abi how can you market a production you don’t like for me and you don’t expect me to reject it? You are a product, market yourself well. If this is the case, then “there is nothing to fear about ‘rejection’. It is God’s protection and a nudge in a better direction”. What feels like rejection is often God’s protection when you are heading in the wrong direction. I am living Testimony.

Rejection puts you out of your comfort zone which is usually when you are at your best…that is having done all the right things. And I end with this quote: “The pain of rejection is nothing compared to the pain of regrets’. It is better to be rejected now than to live your entire life in regrets. From what we have discussed so far, I want you to do personal x-ray of your life, what is the cause of this rejection? What is the cause of this broken relationship? Your sincere answer will tell you the category you belong and the right step to take…whether:

1. You need to run to God for mercy.
2. Wait on Him till He reveals yourself to you.
3. To keep your head up with the break up. Because, truly all things are working together for your good

Having done all, don’t forget the spiritual aspect. Yes, I know enemies could be at work but check yourself first if you are not the real enemy at work. But If some principalities and powers are behind it, of course you need to take it up spiritually in prayers. And the aspect of counselling cannot be ignored. I’m glad you are on this page. The convener of this program is a great counselor, operating under the unction of the Holy Spirit. I’m not saying this to flatter him. NO. Please if you need counseling, feel free to contact our Daddy. I’m sure you will be glad you did. Thank you for the platform sir. God blesses us all in Jesus’ name.

This lecture was originally delivered by Pastor (Mrs) Seyi Pedro-Adeola on 3pG School for the Singles WhatsApp live chat on 13th October 2022.