JOINT ACCOUNT AND FINANCIAL TRANSPARENCY IN MARRIAGE

1. What’s your take on Joint Account for the family?

2. Which of these order will you love to adopt in your home: God > Family > Money or God > Money > Family or Money > Family > God etc.

Joint account does not necessarily mean one family bank account or one bank account for the whole family. This can be true as well but there is no hard rule. Joint family account or simply put family account mean me and my wife is in the know of how much money I make and how I make them, then how and where the money goes to and vice versa. It’s all about trust, financial maturity and transparency. Where love exists nothing is impossible.

 However, individual family should adopt whichever methods they consider best for their family at any point in time as long as trust, honesty and transparency is not eroded. There should not be any hard rules on this. Let everyone be persuaded as it is best for those involved. The problem has never been the joint account but lack of financial transparency between two people.

Some women don’t know and don’t care how their husbands make money, all they want to do is to spend it. A Christian woman will not do that because you are not just interested in his pocket and what he can offer you but his soul and spiritual well-being is of importance as well and the lives of your children must be protected. Parents making money illegally and robbing others to make a living should know that these have ways of bouncing back on the children and this must be avoided.

Isaiah 14:20 “…the seed of evildoers shall never be renowned”

Don’t do things that will make life difficult for your children, some of us are in personal mess today because of the life our parents lived. Thank God for Jesus Christ who is repairing and saving lives.

Also some men don’t really care how their wives make money and when they do, they do so for selfish reasons.  Both partners must be open to each other as joint heirs in one heavenly heritage in Jesus Christ.

However, money and financial issues are issues that each family must talked about, review and updated over and again. The most important thing is both of you should talk about this things as freely as regularly as possible.

This is what courtship is meant for, to eliminate potentially dangerous financial bends and other contours that may be difficult to be dealt with in marriage. There are issues you have to settle and agree upon before wedding takes place, once the bond is tied, any attempt to change some things will be resisted like a common plague, and one of such is Joint family finance and other financial issues as it affects the home. Financial transparency is a sign of Christian maturity and a display of trust. Never take your spouse for a fool when this is so, God hates deceit.

2. Which of these order will you love to adopt in your home: God  > Family > Money or God > Money > Family  or Money > Family > God etc.?

God, family and money, is the Christian order but it is so easy to say and I believe that’s what most people will prefer but in reality is always Money, family and God for a lot of people and in some it’s money, money then God and family in distant third position. This arrangement should never be assumed. Let your partner know your stand and get him or her committed to God, family and money.

You will have to remind yourself of your choice few years after your wedding. There are people whose passion for money is not born again and you need to help influence their view before marriage after which little or nothing can be done.

If you see a man or woman that can do anything for money, please run for your dear life.

Someone once said if the devil can give him a billion in exchange for his soul, he will gladly trade his soul for him, that of what use is his soul if he is poor… I’m talking of a real person here. Love of money is tearing homes and churches apart, never assume your partner is not a money freak. Inability to be financially open to one’s spouse, especially if you have agreed to run a Christian home is an indication of an underlying financial distrust.

1 Timothy 6:6-10

6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.

6:7 For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out.

6:8 And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. 

6:9 But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition.

6:10 For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

And if I may add another fourth, which is church and church activities.

Never allow church activities to take the place of your spouse, children and family welfare. You can’t serve God without your family, that’s not His mind. Always carry your family along in your work with God. So it should be: God > family > church > money.

That’s how God wants it. Any other arrangements is selfish and unbiblical. A happy family makes a happy church and not the other way round.

Transparency breed intimacy and intimacy breed trust. If you trust your partner you will make your finance open to him/her. All official family records should bear your names or any names you both agreed on, including next of kin.  Your spouse is your next of kin, this can only change to your children if you both agreed on it.

No one party (wife or husband) has moral right to make changes without the knowledge of the other, in A CHRISTIAN HOME.

In Christianity there are standard, they may not be popular, many people may not be practicing them but Bible standard cannot be changed. Man and wife are ONE. As long as you cannot have a secret account without your own knowledge, so is your partner, it is ungodly to run an account without the knowledge of your spouse, you are one and same in Christ Jesus. You may not like the idea, but that won’t change Bible standard.

Is either we have Christian marriage or not. There are so many variations out there but most are far from the standard.

“And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously (deceitfully) against the wife of his youth” – Malachi 2:15

Running a secret account or any form of financial secrecy (or any other secret investment) by either party is an act of deceit. They were both naked (open without cover, transparent) and were not ashamed (Genesis 2:25), that did not just apply to marital sexual consummation, it also apply to all relevance marital life including finance, next of kin and having property. There can be no better way to happiness than obedience. Christianity has been bastardized on all fronts God is depending on our generation to make a difference. The fact that many have refused to abide by divine rules for Christian home does not change God’s expectations from families.

“If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them” – John 13:17

May God count on you and find you faithful.

Advice:

All these marital compabilities should be discuss by those already in relationships (or married) where necessary, and those that are not should have the need for such time to discuss in their mind.

Olumofin Kehinde Benjamin writes for Praying Parents Prayer Group Christian Ministry (3pG)